self-effacing prophecy

Photo by David Fee…

There was an outfit that went with these shoes. I didn’t want to post it. I couldn’t convince myself otherwise. I had the hardest time trying to come up with at least one thing that I liked about the way I looked. Nadda a one. Just the shoes. The sweater was loose in all the wrong places, the dress clung to areas it shouldn’t, my posture undesirable –I never knew one could slump their shoulders so much –with my freakishly long arms dangling at my sides, my man hands and chubby fingers attached at their base…

Then I realized, “Hey, that’s me you’re talking about!”. I just went all Mean Girls on my ass. Why? It could stem from a laundry list of things; of which, are not quite important. The important thing is to stop. To all the people who look in the mirror and like everything that they see –yes, I’m talking to you Affirmation Girl— I applaud you. To the rest of us, which includes myself, this “love of self” doesn’t come as second nature. I’ll have to work on that…and acknowledging it is the first step, right?

But for now, I’m still not posting the outfit.


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